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Raising Happy Diabetic Kids
This is the first in a series of articles I am about to embark
upon concerning this subject. As my family gets older and matures
with this disease I think back to the early days and wonder why
aren't we all on medication for depression? Why don't we have
standing twice a week appointments with a psychiatrist? How did
we end up so normal?(whatever that is) As I look back this didn't
happen by accident, nor am I Super Dad, and I didn't plan it out
step by step. It was mostly just paying attention, luck, and
decent communication between my girls and me, granted sometimes
at the top of our lungs.
The first thing I suggest you do is very important. Remember,
our children are who they had in mind when they coined the phrase
"monkey see monkey do". Trust Yourself! It's okay to do it your
way. There're three components to raising happy kids, diabetic or
not. They are Self-Confidence, Self-Reliance, an Self-Control.
The more of these components your monkeys see in you, the more of
these components you will see in your monkeys! I'm going to put
out some ideas here but you're the boss of your situation. Do it
your way.
Upon reading the three components you might ask "but where is
self esteem?" I'll save that particular ramble for another day.
Let me just assure you that if your child has self-confidence,
self-reliance, and self-control then self-esteem comes
naturally.
What is Self-Confidence? Self-Confidence is:
Trusting your ability to form and sustain relationships
Trusting your ability to complete various tasks well, knowing
that others value your abilities
Trusting your ability to manage new siuations
Trusting your own judgements and common sense
As you can see trust is a key element of self-confidence. When
our children don't have that measure of consistency and
predictability in their lives it becomes difficult for them to
gain the necessary trust either in themselves or in others to
become self-confident. So if our children see that the people who
are most important to them (us as parents) trust them and will
provide them with a consistant environment, they will begin to
trust themselves, their judgements, and those of the people
around them. This is the beginning of common sense.(Yahoo!)
How do our children acquire Self-Confidence? Self-Confidence
comes from:
Being accepted for who you are
Having someone show confidence in you
Knowing there is something you are good at
Having firm expectations of other people's behavior
Not being afraid of failure
Developing competence with the saftey of a parent close by
Seeing others you admire and copy, being confident and
happy
It seems so easy when you write it down. When you think about
it three main components have to be in place: Trust and
Predictability, competence, and sociability.
Trust and Predictability - We all know that routines are
important for developing feelings of trust and security. Think
about the routines and relationships between you and your family
and friends. How much do they keep to a pattern? Will your child
begin each day with a reasonably clear idea of what will happen
and when?
Competence - Being good at things. We all have different
talents and abilities. We need to help our children identify the
things they are good at and encourage them. These skills fall
into a couple of different catagories.
Practical: Seeing how to make or mend things, and build
things
Physical: Good at sports, kicking or catching a ball,
swimming, running
Mental: Good ideas about things, good at solving practical
problems, good at schoolwork
Social: Good at playing with others, kind and considerate,
good at making new friends
Process: Being good at tying new things, sticking with
difficult tasks and so on
Sociability - Trust and develope their social skills. Involve
them moderately in your social life. If we have our children with
us it shows not only are we happy to have them with us but also
that we trust they will behave appropriately. Getting used to
being in new situations, and learning to talk to different people
will increase our children's confidence considerably. Here's one
that took me a while to figure out. Give your child advance
warning of your feelings, of short temper, tiredness, sadness, or
whatever. "I've had a lousy day at work and I'm very crabby. It
might be smart to keep your head down and your mouth shut." Or
"I've had an argument with so and so and I'm feeling hurt. If I'm
short with you I'm sorry." This not only teaches them techniques
for managing their own feelings, but gives them a chance to learn
sensitivity to the feelings and moods of others. These are
essential social skills not only for now but for later on in
life.
Our children will develope self-confidence only if we have
first shown trust and confidence in them and have given them an
environment where they can predict and trust. Diabetes and all of
the unpredictability, feelings of powerlessness, and exclusion
that sometimes go with it just make this process that much more
difficult. I look at it like if it was easy any idiot could do
it. Well, we're not just any idiot. We're special idiots. We have
been entrusted with the care and upbringing of a diabetic child.
So remember you are a special person entrusted with a very
special task. Trust yourself. It's okay to do it your way.
In the next issue I'll take a look at Self-Reliance.
Russell Turner is the father of a 10 year old Type 1 Juvenile
Diabetic daughter. When she was first diagnosed he quickly found
there was all kinds of information on the internet about the
medical aspects of this dsease. What he couldn't find was
information about how to prepare his family to live with this
disease. He started a website http://www.mychildhasdiabetes.com
and designed it so parents of newly diagnosed children would have
a one-stop resource to learn to prepare for life with
diabetes.
MORE RESOURCES:
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Diabetes amputations drop, but disease expandsSouthCoastToday.comBy ANIKA CLARK The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention published good news recently for the nation's diabetic adults. In 2008, substantially fewer of them 40 and older received lower limb amputations than they had 12 years prior. |
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Medical experts meet in S'pore for diabetes workshopChannel News AsiaSINGAPORE: Leading international experts in type 2 diabetes are in Singapore to address specific challenges and opportunities of bariatric or metabolic surgery for Asian patients and health care systems. The Asia-Pacific Workshop on Metabolic Surgery ...and more » |
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Program aims to empower diabetes patientsAlton TelegraphBy DAN BRANNAN For those living with diabetes, education is so important and a recent program at Southern Illinois University Edwardsville focused on that topic from A to Z. The annual diabetes education program was held on Jan. 20 at SIUE. |
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